Cat and Mouse

Whose Ahead?

While I am one for a good game of chase you are really starting to take the fun out of this. I want you, you don't want me. You want me, I don't want you. I don't want this to be an endless game of Cat and Mouse.

Why is it when someone no longer shows interest in you, you all of a sudden show interest in them. We are not in the third grade anymore. I told you how I felt and you told me you weren't in the right place in your life. You had to work on you. I respected that. I want you to become the best person you can. I want to be around when that happens so that maybe one day we might be together. But you can not expect me to sit around and wait for you to become who you want to be. I wanted to be more than your friend but that's all you were offering and that is what I took. Why is it that I have to be satisfied with the stipulations that you set forth and don't follow.

You know that I still have feelings for you and you are taking advantage of those feelings. While I am putting up with it now I must warn you, I won't put up with it much longer. I don't like to feel out of control. You like to be in control. We both want things are way. We need to bring this ticking time bomb to an end before it explodes in our faces and the friendship we have now crumbles to pieces. Whose in the lead now doesn't really matter.

I feel we will both be losers at the end of this race.

"Why do you have to like me?"

"Why do you have to be deeply infatuated with me?" I heard this question last night and the first thing I thought was damn. You just insulted me and complemented me in the same sentence. Actually, i don't even think it was a complement. Why cant people just come out and say that I am flattered by your feelings for me unfortunately i do not share them? How hard is that? I understand that some people might not be able to handle such blunt honesty but you of all people should know that I am not one of those people. I don't honestly know how I feel about the situation. What I do know is that I am happy that its out in the open and that I can move on. She's not into me. I can accept that. I do want us to stay cool though. I don't believe that changes my sexual status. I still think that I am interested in dating women. I cant explain why and I'm not going to try because its pointless. I think I am coming along great in life right now.

It is time for a change. I am opening my mind to a new realm. I have come to the realization that I like myself for who I am. I understand that I am overweight and a Little chunky. I can honestly say right now that I don't care. I am happy with who I am. If you cant appreciate me for me then you can "Kick Rocks".

So back to the question at hand. "Why do you have to Like me?" Well let me tell you why! I like you because you make me feel good about myself. I like you because I think of you constantly and want to make sure you are OK and safe. I like you because I can talk to you about anything and not have to worry about you judging me. I like you because you appreciate me for who I am and who I can be. I will continue to like you as long as my feelings will allow me too. I don't like you because its convenient or because of some phase I am going through. I will keep my distance and play it cool and what will happen, will happen. But I will keep liking you since its not your choice!!!!